it's a jungle out there

2010-10-08T22:50:00.001+08:00

I have changed my blog url.
New stuff would be posted here,
http://phoebesimon.blogspot.com/

so long, little one

2010-10-08T18:23:00.003+08:00

Kiki passed away yesterday morning. We came home on Wednesday afternoon and Kavan found her laying in the basket of clothes, looking very ill, with saliva flowing out of her mouth. She was shivering. Mummy brought her to the vet right away. It was a viral infection and the vet was afraid it might have spread to her brain already. She was admitted for a night, and the next morning, she was gone.

Fifa searches for her every now and then. He would go to the bathroom, (Kiki used to love going to the bathroom), meow and leave. I guess it was best that mummy payed the SPCA to bury Kiki. We didnt bring her home and let Fifa see her like that. I mean, after what happened to the dogs, (Lemon was depressed when Dottie died, Vodka was depressed when Sammy died) and our last two cats, (Leo was depressed when Milk went missing) who knew what Fifa would be like.

They were pretty close. They'd go everywhere around the house together. Never thought I'd say that since Fifa was so cold towards her in the beginning. But I think Fifa is happy, still. I always make sure he gets all the attention he needs, to keep his mind off his missing friend. I know it may be weird to some, the fact that I treat my pets like humans, but hey they mean a lot to me.

Anyway, as I was cleaning the litter-box, I saw worms in the stool. I quickly told mummy to make sure she gets Fifa checked. I'm worried he might be infected, though he seemed perfectly healthy. Clean and hyper. No weight loss. If anything, he gained weight. It may not affect him in any way but it could be one of those animal diseases that would infect humans, like campylobacter or cryptosporidium or something. And I dont think I need to remind you that I just cleaned the litter-box. I must have come in contact with the stool without noticing it.

Mummy said okay and then started talking about the neighbour's cats that would always come and visit our house (to steal Fifa's food and most probably relieving themselves at his litter-box).

I wonder when shall Fifa see the vet. Let's have a countdown.

the irony

2010-10-02T15:50:00.003+08:00

so, appreciate.

so sweet I can hardly speak due to such trauma in my teeth

2010-09-25T10:00:00.002+08:00

The first week of mock exam is over. That felt great.

The papers we had this week were good. I have to admit, St. Teresa really knows how to train their students. They give us really hard papers during school exams, and when we face the real thing, it doesnt seem so hard anymore.

I guess there's only one subject I'm not so confident about so far. Wont mention which, but if you know me well enough, you'd know. It's quite funny though!

My back has been killing me. The one thing about exams, is that it gives me really bad back ache. It's nothing like the normal back ache I get everyday, (it does hurt everyday, I just get tired of mentioning it). But this is much worse, affecting both my upper back where the curve is and my lower back where the titanium is. It distracted me during Chemistry tuition yesterday. My surgery side hurt whenever I inhale deeply. Not good when you really need oxygen! Haha.

Well, there's only another week to go. And my spine can give me a rest from all the pain.

But in 59 days, this cycle will start all over again, only this time, in a longer time span. SPM :D
The reason for the smiley isnt because I'm crazy for actually loving the exam, but for feeling extremely excited about what comes after. Freedom!

I'll be leaving school and there is nothing I will miss about it, except my friends. But I can see them anytime I want, so, nope, wont miss a thing!

"It's so close, I can taste it in my tongue"

New Discoveries

2010-09-15T00:32:00.002+08:00

Hello :) It's past my bed time. Well, when it's the holiday, do I need bed time? Okay, dont answer that question. I do. My eyes were heavy earlier but my brain is too active to fall asleep now. No, wait, the brain never sleeps. Ah, too much information. Anyway, here are things I've discovered along the way.

>> My entire life I believed my childhood friend was the same age as I was. Turns out, she's a year younger. I thought everyone thought the same way and this was an interesting discovery, but when I told my mum, guess what. "Yeah, she's the same age as Kavan." I cant believe mummy! But anyway, this discovery doesnt change a single way I feel about her. She's really cool :)

>> Melinda Fiona loves to distract herself during Addmath and blames me for it. But the night always ends up with me being the last to finish. Mel, this is how much I love you; I let you bug me for two hours and let you leave me with a calculator down my throat all alone. Heehee, I love addmath! :D

>> My driving instructor is pretty racist. He's very funny, though! You know some say, "when an Iban curses, there's nothing like it." Well, I've discovered the truth in that phrase.

>> I've lost a disgusting amount of weight. No, I'm not the kind of girl who checks her weight all the time and no, I dont like losing weight. It's hard to gain it back. I want it back. I miss having trouble putting on my favorite pair of jeans. Plus, it's no fun having to pull up your pants every 5 minutes (and I dont want new pants).

There are tons more stuff I'd like to post about, but I refuse to remember them right now. So, yes, I'm going to leave you there. Smell you later, stalker.

September Air

2010-09-10T11:38:00.004+08:00

When I came to you

You breathed into me

covered me and made me real

So you're the one they call Forever

I could stray and you would find me

I could be lost in long, winding roads

Still you'd find me

The wounds on your hands

made me shiver

yet you still flash a smile

took me in and held me closer

The smallest things you say and do

I'd watch, listen

and I'd tremble

a dozen times a day

But I never get tired of knowing

Some say I'm a fool

But my pride is sheltered

And I am not ashamed

Some say you're not real

And this is all just wishful thinking

But you're so vivid to me

as this reality steals me from my own

I dont ever want to go back

I couldnt leave knowing no greater love

And nothing is greater than this

"no wonder you never finish your work!"

2010-09-10T10:37:00.003+08:00

distractions

2010-09-10T09:45:00.002+08:00

How do you suppose I study like this?

And now there're two of them.

This is just great...

so what do you say, if the sky turned grey?

2010-09-09T14:37:00.003+08:00

I say, bring the rain! It's way too hot here.

Oh hello!

So, holiday. Two weeks. Hmm... I dont like this so far. I cant seem to wake up early. By early, I mean before 7am. And no, I have not touched a book. Well, I have. But I abandon them after ten not-so-productive minutes. This is not good. At all.

I think I should live in the in the stone age, well, a stone age with calculators. But goodbye tv, computers, handphones and everything that separates us from the animals...except our thumbs. I love my thumbs. They're hitchhiker's thumbs :)

2010-09-05T18:51:00.001+08:00

So don't feed me to the fire,

and I won't let you down.

narrow gate of mine

2010-09-02T20:52:00.003+08:00

The day I stumbled and fell
I hated you.
I let them take over
The anger, the sadness
The doors to these dark feelings,
unlocked.

Hurtful words
left my lips endlessly,
And I threw them at you.
Inside I screamed,
Alone I cried.
Where were you in all this?

I blamed you for this pain
this abnormality, this difference.
But what good could it do?
I didnt feel any less hurt.

Only when you truly let me endure
The pain of losing my own life
did I realise how bad I wanted it
How much I needed you,
And I need you still.

You gave me strength
I had always begged for
and thought was never granted.
My feet wouldnt be on this ground
If you werent the one
I believe in.

One year, eight months and twenty one days ago
I could've faded away.

You gave me courage to fight the hardest battle.
Though my lungs were almost done,
I wasnt.

This one-man army is yours
For I was a soldier, armed with your love.
And I am thankful now
for every bit of painful blessing
you decide to put me through.

Dear God, I love you.

A surrender

2010-09-02T20:36:00.003+08:00

So you've come for me,
after devouring another.
knowing my sense of resistance is just as weak
Perhaps, I am weaker.

I let you have the best of me,
Maybe it was not the best decision made
Or was I just another slave to your words?

Temptations you present me.
and I spin dizzily in your arms,
as the castles I built in skies
were made visible.

But this has to end, I know
You're only temporary
And you'll disappear in a second.

Your hands I must let go
But saying no leaves me troubled.
So let go of mine,
and let me be
Free of your selfish grasp.

the shackles on my wrists

2010-09-02T20:22:00.004+08:00

ambivalent to the core

a girl, you made me.
i run closer with alacrity
only to find hindrance and,
left i lay beleaguered.

all this does,
it begets misery.
but never are you
to this besotted soul,
a bete noire.

for no airy promises made.
to stop you,
this slips from my grasp.
i can only ponder
with not a right to question
the lilt in your voice that lingers.

but i will not drown in avarice
for thankfully still,
these altruistic prayers stand perpetual
like the shackles on my wrists
and the shadow that follows.

i then begin to grow fond of
an austerity
in which i willingly place my heart.

just a dream this will be

2010-08-19T21:24:00.001+08:00

facing ignorance
i seem to always
stumble upon a problem

it's a fear maybe
i have not learn to know

subconsciously, i see
in great ignorance
they dwell around me

when the loneliness ceases to subside
it pains deeply then

and so decides the heart
alone i stand
in a world of false pretense

Today...

2010-07-18T19:53:00.003+08:00

We have a cat.

Or, a kitten. You may call it that.

We named him Fifa.

Daddy calls him Ganja.

Mummy strangled daddy for calling him Ganja.

We have to put Fifa/Ganja in a cage outside.

Now I'm scared he would get phobia.

National Service = very funny

2010-07-17T22:31:00.004+08:00

and I'm not being sarcastic at all! It really is funny. I cant stop laughing after seeing this.

My closest friends would know why I am very happy about getting chosen xD

An epic final

2010-07-12T19:56:00.006+08:00

And the 2010 FIFA World Cup goes to...

SPAIN !

I woke up at 2.45a.m. and ran downstairs. Daddy was already seated in front of the tv, giving me one of his goofy smiles. He beat me to the tv, it seems. Haha! We did this twice. See who wakes up first. I beat him during the Germany-Spain match. 20 minutes passed and daddy ran downstairs and looked at me, "Why didnt you wake daddy up?" Hahahaha!

Well, the final match was a crazy one! No one should have missed it. Even if you hate Netherlands, for whatever reason I still cant come up with. Even if you hate Spain for beating Germany, or for beating Portugal (haha, Kavan!). Even if you hate Paul, the 'psychic' octopus for all his right predictions. I still dont know how the creature does it but I have a bad feeling about him. My theory? Paul has mastered the logic of probability, which many of us took for granted. It makes perfect sense. And I refuse to believe he has any sort of psychic ability. Now, Ray, quit telling me it's the tentacles...

I never thought Spain would come this far. Yes, I'm a very loyal fan but really, who would've thought? I was scared when they were going against Portugal. I didnt watch that match. Haha! Nights before that, Ashley told me, "We're going to make Cristiano Ronaldo cry. Cry, baby. Cry!" And she was right! Oh, Ashley, you made my day. I love those red and yellow nails of yours, by the way.

So here Spain was, in the final. Oh, the suspense. First half, no goal. Second half, no goal. 90 minutes passed and still no goal. I went around my head trying to think of what should happen next. Extra time! Or... If I had let my imagination come true... Rematch! And the world cup shall not end today. I wish that were the case. But extra time, it is. First half of extra time, still. no. goal. What is this?

Me: Dude, this is a freakin crazy final!
Gurjit: I know! And I'm loving it!

But after Netherlands was short of a player, since Stekelenburg got a red card, haha, Spain finally scored! Go, Iniesta. And to think he was crazy from the beginning. Poor guy kept falling. Not a minute after he got up, a Dutch trips him back down. I feel for you, Andres. But you didnt have to push him.

I gotta admit though, the match was hilarious. Commentator has got a way with words. The bald referee (so everyone calls him) must be tired of pulling the yellow card too many times. Those Dutch players tipped me off. Rough play. And Sneijder! He should have gotten a red card for kicking Alonso in the chest with his boot. Why would you have your foot up that high anyway? I've got my eyes on you, Sneijder. I'm not over this.

If I had to pick a favorite, (off the Spanish squad) in this match, it would be Iker Casillas. I love you so much today, Casillas. Amazing goalie. Nice save. I mean, saves. Fernando Torres, on the other hand, was a disappointment. David Villa made way for him to get in to the pitch only to have Torres enlighten the Netherlands' fans with his hamstring -_-"
I need not to say more.

But I am very very very happy for the win! Teehee! Went to school with a huge smile on my face. I sure did annoy my anti-Spain classmates. They were so depressed. I went to Science 3 to watch Christina and her gang celebrate. Haha! More Spain supporters in that class. Loud supporters, I must say. Very loud. I was so hyper in the morning. But once the break ended, I went back to class and crashed on the table. Mel kept molesting my underarm to wake me up. I became immune to it. Hehe!

I cant wait for the next FIFA! That is if the world doesnt end in 2012...

"In 2013, I'm going to watch the movie 2012 and laugh..."

2010-07-12T19:12:00.001+08:00

"I wanna put your smile on paper"

=)

Rivera

2010-07-11T13:38:00.008+08:00

It was a beautiful morning. Rivera couldn't help but be amazed by the beauty that surrounded her. She had followed where her feet took her and here she was, alone in a garden she had never been to. She didn't know where she was but she couldn't care less. This place was nice. Very serene and peaceful. The weather wasn't as cruel as she thought it would be. The sun didn't shine too brightly and the wind blew so softly.

Rivera had her head tilted up to the skies the entire time. She watched the leaves of the trees fall as her dainty feet strolled quietly around the garden. She kept whispering to herself, "Wow, this is too pretty," and gently touched every blooming flower she laid her eyes on.

"You don't get out much, do you?" a low voice asked.

Rivera quickly snapped back to her senses and turned around. She blushed when she saw Liam, her school mate, who was standing under a tree and smiling at her response. Rivera shut her eyes and couldn't believe how lost she was in the beauty that she didn't notice Liam's presence.

"What's wrong, Rivera?" Liam approached her.

"Nothing's wrong. It's this place. I've never seen anything like it. It's so beautiful. I never thought nature was so beautiful."

Liam chuckled at her answer. "Rivera, you spend your daylight with books and I'm pretty sure you spend your nighttime the same way, too. It's no wonder you never notice these things," Liam told her.

Rivera opened her mouth. She wanted to argue with him but realised that she was better off. He was right, after all. She cringed and thought of better things to say. Liam smiled and walked towards the white wooden bench placed in the middle of the garden. He sat on it and Rivera followed him.

"Well, Liam. Haven't you heard? One must read to gain knowledge," Rivera tried her best to defend her ways.

"Reading isn't the only way to gain knowledge. One must also explore. And please explain to me one thing. How did we end up speaking like poets?" Liam jokingly asked.

They both laughed at the thought of the sentences they had formed in their little argument. Rivera had to admit the truth in Liam's words. One really must explore to gain knowledge and to widen it, too. She was eager to do that; to explore. The only thing that was in her way was her fear. She was afraid of trying new things, afraid of being out of her comfort zone, which was being among books. Liam, then, took her hand and helped her get rid of the fear. Little did she know, this was the day that changed her life forever.

All glory to God.
I was inspired to write after reading The Bible.
Must I really begin to tell you how hard it is for me to find inspiration? :)
This is very short, compared to my usual writings.
I was warned not to write too long.
The disappointment. Ah, but then again, this means a lot to me.

2010-07-10T23:53:00.005+08:00

This week has been a really good one. Why?

1. We didnt study much in school. Okay, that sounded like a good thing in my head but now that I typed it out, it doesnt anymore. In some ways it is, but I'd rather get an overdose of education. Yes, that's the nerd talking. I should stop typing about this now. Moving on...

2. Spain won! (Germany match) Hahahahahahahahahahahaha! I'm sorry, I just have to laugh about this. I only slept for three hours, went to school laughing about the match and then fell asleep after break time. I dont like the fact that my classmates dont talk football. Or at least, talk Spain-won-and-the-match-was-so-solid. But thank God for Mel and Jeff, though!

3. I finally got things right :) Well, only a few people know what this means. It's a little personal. Lets just say I used to bababa and get mad but now I bababa the right way and feel peace :D Right. I think I just confused some people. Hmm...

4. I drove for the first time this afternoon! Mum was so scared earlier. I was in school in the morning, she picked me up and brought me to the "new mall". (I dont know why she brought me there, I dont even like shopping but oh well!) When it had passed 1pm, she still wanted to stay around and asked if I wanted to go to the toy store but when I reminded her I should be driving at 2pm, we quickly got home. On the way, she told me so many things like "dont get distracted, listen to uncle, when you wanna change the gear make sure you press the clutch, dont blur blur. I'm so scared just imagining you drive!" Wow, the trust. Hahah! Well, the first time was fun! I wanted to drive more and I kept shouting in my head, "Let's drive some more some more!" and it's funny how my prayers are answered right away. Uncle let me drive on the main road although I wasnt supposed to because I dont even have my L-license yet. I drove myself home xD According to mummy, the distance I drove was far but it didnt feel like far to me. She said, "That's because you terbang!" Hahahahaha! My instructor kept telling me to slow down or else I would "terbang". Haha! Funny old man...

5. My mum is trying to talk football! I got back from youth gathering and mummy went out. A few minutes ago she texted me...

Mummy: Us spain won.
Me: Mummy, this is very funny because the final is tomorrow night but thank you for building the confidence of talking football. Really appreciate it. Hahahahaha!

...and exactly 13 minutes after that she replied, "Hahahaha, it must be the repeat then".

Haha! That just made my night! My mummy trying to talk football xD

Dear God, you are funny. I love you :D

2010-07-03T14:41:00.003+08:00

"even prayers can save a person..."

smelly melly has jelly in her belly

2010-07-02T23:31:00.004+08:00

I randomly posted this poem on Melinda's Facebook wall. Right after posting a poem on 3sa's. Yeah, I've been talking through poems. Sue me.

I've got nothing better to do
So, I've decided to spam your wall
Random poems I'll send you
Now get on your knees and crawl

Your best trait is your ability to obsess
You're so cheeky and clingy
How do I get out of this beautiful mess?

Maybe I should just stick around
Make you laugh until your eyeballs jump
But you're out of reach
so I slept as the teachers preach

Melinda Fiona, do come back, quick!

She is currently in Barrio. She left yesterday, I've been alone ever since.

Lifeless lips

2010-07-02T22:45:00.002+08:00

Planets are all aligned
above us, we cant see
so far away, stars in the sky
oh, we are outnumbered

we take everything for granted
and our wishes are not fulfilled
we worry our lives away
and we get what we deserve

we ignore, we lie, we pretend

we are all innocent

up until the time we see
our regrets staring at us
guilt run through our veins

we cant stop this
for our lips have told too many lies
they cant be saved
they are dead

no more confessions to tell
and so our fate will be
just like that
of our lifeless lips

Glad you decided to act like a total stranger

2010-07-02T21:37:00.006+08:00

remember how you used to make me feel invisible?
have a little taste of your own poison now
You're in the same room
You're next to me
But I stopped noticing
I dont see you anymore
Your ignorance doesnt get me mad
like I used to be
I feel nothing now
not the slightest bit of regret either

still standing here

2010-06-15T00:41:00.003+08:00

My grandfather passed away on Sunday morning. The funeral was earlier today, in the afternoon. It was hard but we all said our goodbyes. I spent the entire day serving people yesterday and not looking into the coffin where my grandfather laid. I wasnt ready. I didnt wanna break down like I did before. Trust me, you dont want that happening. It will give you the shock of your life.

I went and looked at him right before we went home lastnight and also today to say goodbye, right before they closed the coffin. No emotional breakdown.

As said, I'll cry everything off and move on. The bad things that have happened or are happening or will happen, cannot force my hand to raise a white flag. God has my back.

I missed the bus ride to Batang Ai, which was this morning. Mum already informed Sarah (our youth leader). Mum said that dad would send us there tomorrow morning. It takes three hours, so I guess I'll meet all of you (who are probably wrapped up in your sleeping bags by now) at lunch time. Cant wait!

I shall go and pack now. As for you stalkers who come by to read this blog of mine, I'll smell you later. By later, I mean Friday ;)

2010-06-15T00:35:00.003+08:00

"I figure, if you're extremely passionate about making music (or painting, or surfing, or acting..) then it's because you should be. There is so much real and lasting happiness locked up inside the passion for doing what you love, and even though we live in a society that cares more for the effectiveness of an individual than his/her happiness, I still hope and pray that I stay passionate enough to keep pursuing something worth more than just being "effective". This answer has already become way too deep and hippie, but the truth is that my "musical talent" wouldn't make any sense to me if it didn't result in creative expression that is liberating, and something that is worth more than financial profit; any passionate musician knows this."

Do you believe in hard work or pure talent? Both! I believe that talent is a great way to start the journey, but that hard work is the only way to finish it.

- Cobus Potgieter

they just keep on coming

2010-06-10T09:55:00.005+08:00

My grandfather on my dad's side was in a coma last Saturday. Mum and I rushed to the hospital. Thankfully, he was awake when we arrived. I sat next to his hospital bed, shut my eyes and whispered prayers. The same prayers I whispered when I was admitted in the hospital two years ago. They got me out of the hard times. I was hoping they would work the same way on him.

He was fine for a moment, but got back into being really ill. He's still in the hospital right now. Mum and dad went there again earlier today. A few days ago mum told me that he might not be around for long. I've accepted that.

Well, it has been really tough, everything that has happened lately but I'm not going to let anything bring me down. I cried them off. There's no need for depression or sad faces. Just prayers.

I really can't wait for the next youth gathering. I cant wait to hug Theresa. Burst of love, 3sa! And I cant wait to be surrounded by a hall full of people with so much love and faith in them. So much shouting, too :) I'm really happy there.

And I want to stay happy.

Goodbye, Sammy

2010-06-04T21:21:00.005+08:00

Sammy passed away today.

He was really weak lastnight. He didnt want to eat. He just laid there. When I held him, he would wag his tail but you would know something was wrong because his tail was down. Vodka was fine, she still had the energy to run around but didn't want to eat either. We thought she must be like that because Sam wasn't well.

Before we left home this afternoon, I went to their cage and checked on Sam. He looked up at me and wagged his tail. He looked better than he did lastnight. I was gaining hope.

It's really funny how good times always end with a bad one. I thought that was over for me. Lately, whenever I have a good day, I'd always end up sleeping with a smile on my face, and thanking God repeatedly before I fall asleep. But things went back to the way it used to today. I had a really good time hanging out with Kenaidy earlier, (though Nelson left and Gurjit never showed up). But when I got home, mom told me Sammy died.

I couldn't believe my ears. I thought she was joking. Then I realized she would never joke about anything like this. It would just be so cruel. I ran to where Sammy's body laid. I touched him and it was as if he was still there. He wasn't cold at all. He just wasnt moving, wasnt breathing, wasnt wagging his tail. I held him for quite a while, still couldnt believe he was gone.

Mom said he could've been poisoned. Before he passed, there was blood coming out of his anus. Mom saw him die just a few seconds before we arrived. She said he was wailing and when his wailing stopped, he was gone. It must be a really painful sight. We buried Sam soon after.

We're really worried about Vodka now. She might have been poisoned too. She goes wherever Sammy goes. Eats whatever Sammy eats. And she's getting weaker and weaker. She laid in the front porch and her breathing grew heavy. Just as Sammy did.

I'm not mad at God. I'm just mad at the heartless person who poisoned them. I cant forgive you. I know I should, but I cant bring myself to do so. This is too painful.

Sometimes God takes away the things we love so our hands would be free to receive something better. I dont know what could be better than Sammy or what could replace him. But I'm keeping my trust in God. He would heal Vodka if that is His will. And if it isn't, I'll understand.

But it doesn't mean I've given up.

confessions of a dreamer

2010-05-22T12:14:00.003+08:00

They say dreams are only for those who are asleep
I must ask;
What about those who are awake?
What do they do?
They regret, don't they?

I don't want to live in hypocrisy
like the rest of the world
who grow up to hate their lives,
who walk around complaining about their pathetic jobs,
who regret the things they have and have not done
When they were younger,
when they still had time and hope;
slowly slipping and losing grip
But are now too late to gain

I believe life is only as hard as you let it be.
Fight and you will fly,
surrender and you are damned

I wanna save the sick and the homeless,
The weak and the hopeless

I wanna save the animals and trees,
The generation,
The future.

Let the world face no evolution
Let the world face no disaster
I wanna save everyone and everything,
everywhere.

I am too strong of a fighter,
Too big of a dreamer
I have too much to offer
and I will never take no for an answer

Mock me if you must,
But when all hell breaks loose,
I know what I wouldn't be.
I won't be the one crying and falling.
I won't be the one who brought misery to herself.

My battle scars may never fade,
But at least I can live and die
with no regrets.

I actually wrote this last year for a poem writing competition in school. Honestly, I never planned to post it online because it was written in such an angry state (personal issues). But since I decided to have it submitted to the school's magazine this year, I thought "Oh well, there's no harm in posting it on my blog since everyone's gonna read it one way or the other". Besides, my Miri bestfriend have not read it yet ;D

His footprints

2010-05-09T00:41:00.006+08:00

I get distracted by you
not to the point that I lose all my senses
I wouldn't even call it a distraction,
really
because you're nothing
of that sort

You're nothing
mean or selfish or arrogant
greed doesn't stir in you
neither does all things sinful

I love how you love me
how you love everyone
and everything
How you would do anything
to save

You bring the word Sacrifice
a whole new meaning
One no one can top

When you say
In every love song, there's a lover
And how you hoped you would be
just that
in my heart

It puts a smile on my face
you can never erase this, Lord

When I look up at the skies
I wonder how you made them blue
I gave up sleep
just to be amazed by you
and you never fail me

You have
what no other boy can take
or steal from me
It is rightfully yours

This love
This faith
This strength
These hands and feet
This heart

You have all of me
and I love you more for that

Gravity

2010-05-07T23:37:00.004+08:00

I'm not proud of this
I hope you are
of yourself
You've got me coming back
got me caught in the middle

Funny,
I was always so sure of
everything
Doubts rain over me now
And I don't like this

You're like gravity
I don't like that either

As I led myself away
You tend to grab my hand
stand in the way
look me in the eye
but all I see is false hope
what are you doing?

You lost yourself
in all that pretense
Who are you fooling?
You're taking too long
And I'm tired

Your shoulders aren't
the best pillows
I've seen
Your voice isn't
the best lullaby

It's Thursday
but I'm out of your sight
I'm missing
Get used to it
because I'm done trying
You can never make up your mind

she who screams

2010-05-01T08:53:00.004+08:00

my ears are beginning to bleed
what with all of your childish acts
you whine and stomp your feet
as things don't go your way

why would it?
for a person as such
you just wouldn't keep it in
leave that patience running thin
oh, how quick you let things go

and all for what cause?
what do you expect?

attention
you've got it
they all hate to look at you
they curse you under their breaths
their bad intentions
you have them all

satisfaction
you just can't enjoy
that anger leaves you
with an ugly face
were you ever satisfied?

are you happy now?

Update

2010-04-25T13:33:00.003+08:00

Hello, people :)
As you can see, I'm back to being poetically possessed.
I'll be writing more poems now. Not all the time, though. And I might not post all of them. I'll try to post some every week, that is if there are any written or worth posted.
Exams are starting soon and by soon, I mean on the 29th!
I'm super busy. It's the year 2010, what do you expect, right?
I'll have about 2 weeks of exams and there's a huge chance I might not be blogging in all that stress. Exam ends on the 14th, I guess, I dont know, gotta check the timetable. Haha!
I'll keep you posted.
In the mean time...

spread love like fire!

if you only knew what your little girl feels

2010-04-25T13:14:00.003+08:00

Why is it so hard to swallow?
I was made for chasing dreams
and I'll do just that
your only one
who created her own road
to walk on
Still you hold her back

I kicked and
I pushed my way
through
I see how you go easy on them
I long for that
Acceptance, too

Independent, yes
but I still need you
I cant do everything
all on my own
I'm just a child
I'm your child

Why won't you help me?

you can go now

2010-04-25T13:07:00.003+08:00

Soon will it be
a month now
How fine I was
until I started thinking
did I not know?
I miss the person I thought
you were
you could have been
the person you are not

An illusion to believe,
I did
just a speck of dust
formed into perfection
You are
At least that's what I thought

All in darkness
the little girl whispers alone
I miss my old friend
here he is
he stands right next to me
I cant feel him
he's gone

2010-04-11T13:04:00.003+08:00

it's amazing how you can give me a heart attack
and heal it in a second with your smile

I wouldn't mind having millions of that...

golden socks

2010-03-28T11:54:00.002+08:00

We all (my sis, bro and I) decided to name her Vodka instead.
Dont worry, though. She's not confused.
We never called her by any name before until we were sure of what to name her.
So, Dean is now Vodka!

brand new bears

2010-03-20T15:27:00.004+08:00

We got two more puppies! Dad said they were both male, so Kavan and I decided to name them Sam and Dean. Yes, we love Supernatural that much!

It's been almost a week now and dad recently told us that Dean is a girl. Wow, what a surprise. But the name is still sticking!

From left: Dean and Sam

Sam, the all black puppy

Dean, the one with golden socks

After bathing them

....

2010-03-14T21:02:00.002+08:00

I do...

This reminds me of Karissa Kara Simon!
Except... She hides them under her bed -.-"

A shock, I deserved

2010-03-12T19:03:00.004+08:00

did you feel it coming?
I was slowly getting rid of you
bit by bit
A two-day survival
yesterday could have made it a three
but there you go again

Just one smile
and you're off the hook

You gave me a shock
I deserved

Forgive me
for letting my stupidity take over
giving you what looks like a smug
You caught me by surprise

Do it more often
I'll get the hang of it
I know it for a fact
I will :)

He one spinal cracker

2010-03-08T23:36:00.006+08:00

Jonathan "Legacy" Perez

First time I saw this guy auditioned on So You Think You Can Dance, I thought, "Holy kabooki, the dude has gotta be the best B-boy ever"

Like everyone else did, I expected him not to be able to dance other styles. But when I turned on the TV today, this is what I saw!

Amazingly talented, this guy!

In every forest there are trees

2010-02-28T11:11:00.005+08:00

Hello, fellow earthlings.

Haha! I've got exams this week. Have been a total geek since Friday. Yes, I practice procrastination. Sue me.

I'm not the study-during-holiday kind of person. Trust me, I've tried. It's just so hard to wake up during the holidays when your room is dark and your bed is so comfy and the weather is cold.

My alarm would scream,

"DONT PATRONIZE! I realize, this is my real life.
I'm half asleep and I'm wide awake..."

Marianas Trench usually wakes me up every morning. It makes me jump whenever Josh Ramsay scream that first verse all of a sudden. But I have become immune to it. So I switched to Skillet. And that was how I woke up at 8.30a.m. this morning. Best record!

I'm not gonna convince myself that I will screw any paper. Thanks to 3sa and her brother's smart choice of book, I've learned that you will become what you believe.

Remember the story of the three blind men in the Bible? They believed that Jesus could heal them and so Jesus said, "According to your faith be it done unto you". They immediately received their sight. Notice that it was their faith that turned the situation around? So, yes, I'm taking that note in and leave the rest to God :)

I shall come back next weekend when the exam is about over (still gotta sit for the Moral paper on the coming Monday). Or maybe I wont come back and update. Who knows... ;) I might just talk to my bed and fall asleep. Hmm... what shall I choose to do?

I personally love this

2010-02-21T03:50:00.002+08:00

This secret

2010-02-21T02:49:00.000+08:00

Rules are meant to be broken, right?

2010-02-18T23:25:00.003+08:00

I seem to break at least one rule every time I step in to Padini.

One time, I walked in with my awesome strawberry yogurt shake and the guy told me, "I'm sorry but you cant bring drinks in here". I skipped my way out.

Yesterday, 3sa and Ray were trying on sunnys. 3sa told me to take pictures. So I took my phone and shot her. Tried to shoot Ray when a guy came up to me and said "I'm sorry, miss, no pictures". I laughed and nodded my head repeatedly, though I did not know that rule exists either.

Checked the rules. There were only three; No food or drinks. No picture-taking. No pets.

Well, well...

This means only one thing...

"Lemon! Castro! Get ready, we're going to Padini !"

My doggies are amazing :)

Updates!

2010-02-18T22:34:00.002+08:00

rocked the city

2010-02-05T21:39:00.002+08:00

Went for the Change Your World concert last Saturday night with 3sa. Relent rocked the house. The ground was literally shaking. It was beyond awesome and it is beyond my vocabulary of words to describe. So, I wont be saying much now. Still am speechless.

I went through a lot trying to convert these video files just to make it big enough for you to see. I doubt you'd be able to hear clearly, though. I used to my phone, no camcorder =/ Haha!

..........................................................................

Okay! Scratch that. You cant hear anything at all in the videos I've converted, but oh well! I'm just gonna go and edit them into one video. You gotta wait though. Bahahahaha!

sleep deprivation

2010-01-30T05:43:00.003+08:00

I slept for eleven hours straight. From 5.30 pm yesterday until 4.30am. I feel so cool! Yes, I know it's nothing special, but dear, havent you noticed? I have no life. This nerd has been real busy since the day school started. Dean, I am so not gonna miss high school. Trust ME.

While I was half asleep, mom called. I had no idea what time it was. Probably 7pm or so. She said, "Pip, I'm at Hui Sing. Do you want char kueh?".
In my head, I thought of the sweet noodle. So I went, "Huuuuuh? What?" and she repeated, "I'm at Hui Sing, do you want char kueh again?".
I was still thinking about the sweet noodle but I said, "Yes, of course" anyway. Went back to sleep.

I woke up after dreaming of 3sa squeezing the life out of me. That was 4.30am. Nice, 3sa. See what you did. Make me hug you so many times until I actually dreamed of it!

Brushed my teeth and I think I woke dad up in the process cos while I was heating the char kueh in the microwave, dad walked downstairs all dressed up like an athlete. He went jogging. I'm gonna have softball later at 8am.

Got sta get ready !

Softball Madness

2010-01-22T22:36:00.004+08:00

Yet another rant.

The after effects of sleep-deprivation. I cant stop talking nonsense, I might as well type another post before I crash, right?

So, second practice was on Wednesday afternoon. Now that was something! We ran 3 rounds around the school, ran back to the field and did some jumping and push-ups, before we started throwing balls at each other.

Dear God, you have no idea how much I miss running and sweating. Ok, maybe you do know, since you created me and all. That was just a figure of speech. But point is, thank you so much and I love you, Father, you are amazingly awesome! Amen.

Forgive me, Ray, for hitting your shoulder. And 3sa, those seven hits are my seven blessings for the near future if anything were to happen to your bra and panties. Yes, that's the brain telling me I need to sleep. Jay, you should've let me try to kill you instead. Mel, you're so right, that sunblock sure is strong!

Haha! I felt like I was walking with barbecued chicken legs. The sun was scorching hot. Everyone thought I got a sunburn but HAHA! I did not ;P

Everything hurts after that though. My arms, my shoulders, my thighs and even my butt cheeks! I have no idea how that even makes sense. Everything still hurts now. Especially my right arm and butt cheek. But dont worry, I can totally handle playing drums tomorrow. Ahh so excited! Cant wait!

Here are pictures from Wednesday!

Getting ready for my ball, aye?

Aiming at 3sa ! Got my game face on, yo.

Jay, the president !
(I like the sound of that, Jay)

Ray and her bottles.

One pretty awesome Saturday

2010-01-17T17:44:00.006+08:00

Did new things! Awesome new things. It was pretty hectic, how full the day was. Went to school in the morning for our very first softball practice. It wasnt much since there were so many juniors and so little time. (I am one of the juniors too haha)

Went to church in the afternoon for the one thing I've been longing for; DRUM LESSON ! Whoot! Finally, I get to hit things. Release stress in the form of drum beats. Uncle Louie, Dan's dad, was the one giving the lessons. He is super cool. He hits with the enthusiasm of a teenager, which made everything a lot more exciting! :D

After the lesson, I went upstairs to join 3sa, Ash, Alicia and Dan. All four were playing base... I guess. I dont know, I'm not a plucking-strings kind of person. Haha! Not that I have anything against that ;)

Snapped some pictures using 3sa's camera, hit the table with the drumsticks, watched 3sa try to play something on the piano, I tried to play the Mr. Bean theme song on the piano. Dan played Muse's Supermassive Black Hole on base and Ash sang to it, she sounded exactly like Matthew Bellamy. Epic! After a while, I got tired and slept in the corner of the room... And the sounds these guys made were pretty soothing in a way.

Anyhoo, pictures! (stolen from 3sa's facebook)

Missed a beat !

Doing their own thing...

3sa danced.
Dan watched.
Ash took over the drumsticks and switched to rockstar mode!

Goodbye, love.

2010-01-15T22:57:00.005+08:00

The saddest stage of being a skater, is when you seriously have to stop. I have reached there. It's time to face it. I cant skate anymore.

No more adrenaline rush.
No more tricks. (not that I have landed much)
No more falling on my ass.
No more threatening the dogs with my board.

Because if I do fall, the titanium in my spine might just break or whatever it does when you fall. Doctor never explained it. I just cant fall. I'm not allowed to. Whack, isnt it?

So I guess I'm just gonna hang my deck on the wall and reminisce.

I'd probably collect decks now. Hehe! That will be almost as awesome as skating.

But I still want a set of trucks though. Just in case I cant handle myself, I'd just kick push my way through.

First rest I had all week

2010-01-09T18:48:00.002+08:00

It's Saturday.

Just when I thought I was finally gonna get more than nine hours of sleep, school had to have KK registrations. Had to come before eight just to wait around for two hours until everything started. So we (3sa, Ray and I) went on and on about the whole racism issue and then it turned to Marianas Trench and Disco Curtis, or more like "Tanner, baby! We're going down slowly, take me!..." Ray came up with that. She didnt wanna sing "Ashley, baby..." cos she was mad at the video where Ashley had stolen her Tanner baby. Ok, that is too much "baby" in one topic. Moving on...

The only reason I was eager to get up this morning was because 3sa had told me yesterday that there are drum lessons today at 10.30am and 2pm. Obviously, I wasnt gonna make it to the 10.30am lesson, I had to go for the Joyful Vanguard meeting. When we were just about done, 3sa texted me and said that the 2pm lesson got canceled. Excitement went boom and I didnt have time to escape the blow. Wow, there's an over-dramatic ending right there. Haha! I was just kidding.

So, I went home and took a nap. A 5 hour nap. Oh that felt so good!

And now I have to go back to being a nerd. Heh.

Arkk I have so much to say!

2010-01-08T19:43:00.003+08:00

Went to the hospital today. As expected. Doc tells me that I look good but the X-Ray doesnt but that's okay! What's new? Young doctors who say, "Hang on, let me get my boss and ask him what to do about you". And I had to fill in forms about how I've changed since the operation and how it is affecting my personal life and personal relationships. Dude, I dont have a boyfriend, never had one and dont want one. So, how it's affecting my personal relationship? None (check box?) Check!

There were a lot of 'funny' questions and some very irritating. I fkin hate it when they ask you to rate the amount of pain you're feeling. Give it from a scale of 1 to 10 or is it "mild" or "moderate" or "moderate to severe" or "severe" ? Oh come on. It's painful, get rid of it! Or when people ask you, "What is it like? Is it like a cramp or is it like ants biting you or pinching pain or sharp pain?" Screw you. There are no ants around, even if there were, I would know how it feels like to get bitten by ants and this is not it. This is just ridiculous. It seriously gets me mad whenever somebody asks me these.

Mom was acting weird too. She was saying things that dont even make sense. She was making things up. Like when she told the doctor that I complained so much about the pain until I wished I never had the operation. Wtf? I never said that. As a matter of fact, I am glad I had the operation. I just dont wanna have to go through it for a second time cos I might just give up the next time I cant breathe without feeling like my lungs were being crushed by rocks. (Just so you know, I nearly did give up the last time. I wanted to hold my breath until I fade. I did hold my breath more than three times. So please be grateful for my presence) And she kept bugging me when I was filling up the forms and answering the questions. She was the one who answered most of them. Yeah, that's the Scoliosis patient right there. Hey, I'm just here to sit and goyang kaki. Should have given them her cell number instead of my own.

I asked Dr. Zaki (the boss) if I can play sports now. And he said yes! HAHAHAHAHA! You have no idea how happy I was to hear that. I so wanna play squash and run and sweat like crazy again. I miss it so much. But of course, I cant join competitions though. That would stress my spine. I can only play for leisure. But hey, competition or no competition, main thing is, I get to play sports again! :D

So, Teng, Jay, Ray, I dont have to be a bench-warmer in the softball team after all !

But I still cant run 5 laps, though... (hehe)

senior year

2010-01-08T19:02:00.004+08:00

Wow, that makes me sound old. Note to self: Change that title.

Hello, Mr. PC, havent seen you all week, nice to see you up and working. Probably cos DAD has been using you. Damn I miss playing The Sims 3. My sister called me up lastnight just to ask me where to buy balloons and a birthday cake in the game cos her sims' baby is growing up into a toddler and wants a birthday party. Great. Throw a party without me. How very thoughtful of you.

Anyhoots, enough on that sims rant. I'm in Form 5 this year. After SPM I'll be saying "So long suckah!" to high school.

I'm in a separate class from my Apek Clan. 5Science2. I know it's kind of a bad idea to leave Theresa and Ray together, since Theresa is most likely to consume Ray for breakfast every morning. But hey, they survived! Sure, they did ask me to come back to the third class cos they dont wana see anyone else get the top position, but after knowing Madam Screamo is still their class teacher? No way, dude! My ears are screamo-phobic. And I love my class. Miss Chung is cool. Firm, but cool. She teaches us Addmath and Physics. Which is good, cos I dont think anyone can actually scream formulas and equations in my ears to force them up my brain and expect me to get an A. Screamo does teach us Math, but she doesnt look like she has the guts to bully students in my class. Take that, baldy!

I'm starting tuitions. Addmath, Biology, Physics. Was supposed to go for Chemistry today, but I had to go to the hospital. There are pros in being physically challenged ;) Haha! I had to go for Bio and Phy without Theresa and Mel. I didnt mind the Bio class. But Physics? People were staring at me like I was an alien with a purple tail or something. Geez.

Ok wow, I sure talk too much. I've been super hyper this week. Cant sleep at night cos I couldnt stop talking to myself in the dark. I think I should stop here. Ok bye now

I run a very tight business

2009-12-23T20:10:00.003+08:00

This Holiday

2009-12-21T12:52:00.004+08:00

I gotta say, this must be the best holiday ever! I'm actually excited for Christmas. This doesnt happen ever so often because before, we would usually have to drive for ten hours from Miri to Kuching and have absolutely no friends to visit.

Well, now I guess that is one of the pros of living in Kuching, aye? Friends to visit and to hang with when you get bored.

I dont remember ever getting bored this holiday. I've got the game I love and am totally hooked on. I've got the DVD's to watch, all four complete seasons of Supernatural, baby! And I've got a driver. Make that two drivers. Both my sis and Kiddy.

Mom's cool with everything, as long as she doesnt have to drive us around. Haha! She was even cool with me getting hooked on The Sims 3 while she was baking cookies. Mmm...kitchen smells really good, I tell ya!

Oh! And mom totally approved on my wanting to go for drum lessons next year :D I'm so stoked! Just need to get a pair of drumsticks. Asked Kiddy how much that would cost and he started talking sizes and types. I sat there nodding my head cluelessly. He also said that I'd get blisters and crusty skin from holding drumsticks too long. I dont mind it at all. Because hey, I can live with bruises and a six inch scar near my ribs, I can bear blisters anytime :D

About the only thing that's out of place this holiday is the fact that Yayo has been missing for 4 nights and 3 days. I am still counting. I miss that furry thing. Last time I saw him, he was sleeping on the couch next to me while I was playing TS3. Guess the music soothed him.

Pray to God he'll come home unharmed (and probably hungry, too) . We'd be ready to give you food and milk, Yayo. Just come home :)

2009-12-13T17:41:00.002+08:00

I'm not the typical blusher-lipgloss-mascara-makeup-crazy kind of girl.

Raindrops

2009-12-11T14:14:00.003+08:00

raindrops keep falling on my head,
they keep falling...

That song creeps me out. The only reason I'm singing it right now is because I'm bored out of my skull, sitting here just waiting for mom to come home so she can send me to Theresa's house. Let me play already! And I am so hungry I could eat this whole house.

Just texted sis. Asked if she's gonna make it before Christmas. (yes, my wife, I stole your best line) Bahahahaha!

Okay! I think somebody's at the gate !

Wo0o0o0oh0o0o0o!

Teng, here I come !

2009-12-01T18:18:00.001+08:00

Hello, December

2009-12-01T17:25:00.007+08:00

I guess it was worth it
having you right next to me
just like old times

When we both tore that paper
I couldnt help but think of how far apart we have grown
But I was so glad
You're back to your old self

Reckless and clumsy
Talkative and funny
So senseless

Your jokes never made sense
but they made me laugh
Probably because I was knocked out of my senses too

I wish to stay asleep

Because in reality,
you make me sick to my stomach
Funny how time have the ability to change people

I hate the person you have become

Such a shame
You're a smart boy
I think it's time you act like one

So Raw

2009-11-30T11:20:00.001+08:00

I love my piggies

2009-11-24T01:46:00.005+08:00

They are the reason why I log in to Facebook :)

Rooster

2009-11-19T00:46:00.002+08:00

I miss these guys. Wish they never broke up :(

staring at the sun

2009-11-18T23:50:00.005+08:00

"You took everything while I was staring at the sun."

The only thing about this is my mom's reflection on the window...

St. Joseph's Cathedral

Ninja attack

2009-11-17T14:56:00.003+08:00

Ninjas. Sharp flying objects. Grenades. American footballers.
What the truck?

So I hopped off the boat and on to the dock. It was chaotic. Everyone was running away from where I was standing. I decided to join them. I saw this guy, wearing a blue Ancient Chinese Emperor suit. He was big and he had a Samurai sword in his right hand. He ran towards the dock and the red emperor was just standing there. The blue emperor stabbed him in the gut.

And down goes the red emperor.

I turned to this lady and said, "Our king is dead! The guy killed him."
The lady went, "Shh... Be quiet."
A bunch of Malay boys started shouting, "Merdeka!"

The lady grabbed my hand and brought me into the woods. She told me that I had to be protected. She gripped my left hand and we ran. I didnt think she knew someone was following us. It was a guy in white shirt and black pants. I had a feeling he was Chinese.

Me: Someone's following us.
Lady: We have to run faster! *runs faster*
Me: He's fast! Just five feet away from us. And I cant see his face!

Probably because his head was turned 180 degrees. I could only see the back of his head. But his body was facing us. That was a creepy sight.

After a while, the guy stopped. He stood there just watching us. I could see his face this time and I was right, he was Chinese. We ran faster but it felt like there was an invisible wall in our tracks. The guy laughed.

Guy: You cant go through that thing. Here, this way.

He brought us around this huge tree and we came to a bridge. We were under it and the guy started planting something near this tree next to the bridge. I saw a guy all dressed in a black ninja suit at the other side of the bridge. I was amazed. But at the same time, I was scared he might attack. So I whispered to the lady, "Ninja! Ninja! Ninja!"

BOOM !

Apparently the guy we were with was planting a grenade near the tree. He was bombing the ninjas and they fell into the river. The ninjas didnt get hurt. Doi, they're ninjas, what do you expect? Stupid Frank.

The ninjas started throwing shiny sharp objects at us. You know those sharp things, right? They hurt you but they never hurt the ninjas even though they fly back. Useless. So I jumped up and down to dodge them. Surprisingly, I was awesome. I didnt get hurt. I was running towards this building when I saw one ninja and I thought, "Damn, that ninja is cute!"
And he threw a sharp object at me. I jumped but it hit my neck. It didnt hurt at all. I took it out of my skin and threw it back at him.

Suddenly, a bunch of American footballers ran out of the building and started attacking the ninjas. They attacked me too. I guess, we're all enemies here. I saw one American guy raping a girl. I started hitting him with a big fish. (No idea where the fish came from) But the half naked girl seemed excited. Whoops, I guess he wasnt raping her. They ran into a room and the other American guys joined them. I sorta had an idea what they were planning to do. Gangbang.

So I ran out and slammed the door. The ninjas ran to me and started jumping up and down, laughing at the Americans. They cheered in victory.

That has gotta be the most random dream ever.

Tokiwado !

2009-11-17T14:20:00.003+08:00

Have you ever had a tokiwado in your life?
I sure havent... Up till today.

My sis came home with her friend...
Kara: Pip, you want? Tokiwado.
Me: What?
Vanessa: Here, tokiwado ah? We cant find anything else.
Me: Are you guys speaking Japanese now?

Oh, what a discovery! I never knew what these things were called. I mean, I only go to Magic Bite for the waffles. Mmm, waffles... And if I ever decided I'd have these things, I'd just point at them and go, "I want that!"
And I never did decide I want them...

So far, I've eaten two tokiwados. And I dont like them. But they're still here, on the table, right next to the CPU, waiting for me to munch on them. Let's just keep them here anyway.
I figured they'd all be in my tummy by the end of this hour...

Thursday

2009-11-12T17:00:00.007+08:00

I am currently eating a bun. Not just any bun. It's the Jolly Bee bun! It's massive and it's sweet and it's got nice yellow crumbs on it. Mmmm... Almost choked on it while trying to get online. Curse you mother trucking streamyx.

Along with 200 plus unlucky students, I had to come to school today for the prize giving ceremony. While Ray stayed home sleeping. How convenient is that thought?

I was falling asleep just 40 minutes after it started. So I decided to sit up straight. Clapped my hands even when I'm not supposed to. And when it was my turn to get up on stage, I was alive again. Grab the thing and baaam!
I was gone.

Mom: Let me take a picture of you.
Me: *stands there smiling like a squirrel*
Mom: Ok. Not so clear. Can you go? I wanna go.
Me: I gotta go to the toilet. Wait for me.
Mom: Ok, I'll wait. *starts to walk back in to the hall*
Me: No, no. Here's the plan. Go downstairs and wait for me. I'll go to the other side and tell the teacher I need to go to the toilet. And when I'm done, I'll meet you downstairs.

That plan worked out very well. I should be a ninja agent or something :D
And the prize I got was the weirdest thing ever.

I mean, it looks like this

I dont even know what to call it. It looks like it came from outer space.
Or maybe it's a space shuttle.
Does St. Teresa have a space shuttle?!!

The gun doesnt work

2009-11-12T13:23:00.002+08:00

I figured; since I cant shoot you, I'll turn you into a vampire.
That way, Taycob would be disgusted (:

The Mormon Church supports gay rights

2009-11-11T23:40:00.005+08:00

How cool is that ? :)

Read on

That was quick!

2009-11-09T23:48:00.006+08:00

W0O0OO0O0OH0O0O0O !

or, in Ray's term,

HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOZAAAH !

Dad turned off the TV and started scraping some kind of metal. I mean, that's what it sounded like. And if that were the case, mom would go berzerk if he messed up the living room.
After 5 minutes of scraping metal, he finally walked upstairs and said the magic word.

"Goodnight!"

I shall show you pictures of my genius pets now...

This is my oldest pet, Bl4ze910. (Blaze910) Cos he's blazin'

This is 0llie540. I created him last Saturday.

And my latest addition! Medison_brother.
Dont ask me why his name is like that. I wonder, too.
I adopted him from the pound. His last owner must've gone nuts.
He's an alien by the way. He's so different from Blaze and Ollie.
Obviously...

I want foof

2009-11-09T23:13:00.003+08:00

When I hopped into the car after school today, mom told me that daddy's coming home. I immediately thought, "Oh, no! My pets! My Neopets!"

Dad likes to believe that online games (like Neopets), can kill the PC. Strange, indeed. He's got wild imaginations, that man. I think that's where I got mine. But mine's a hell lot worse.

I cant handle reading scary books but I love watching scary movies. I blame my imaginations.

Anyhoots, back to my story...

So, dad's back and I have to fight for the modem with him. Again. And I cant get on Neopets cause he would go, "Haaah!" (I can so sound like him)

About Neopets, I dont remember how I started playing it. All I know is this; I love cartoons and I love animals, especially weird ones that can read. And all three of my pets LOVE to read. They kept telling me to buy more books. So I was online up til 4.30 a.m. spending thousands of Neopoints, buying books for them. Sometimes I think I'd rather live in Neopia. I'd earn 6000 NP a day by playing silly games. Dodge the ice cream. Haha! I got tons of Neopoints from doing just that! :D

Right now, as I type this, daddy's behind me watching football. I shouldnt have told him that Chelsea beat Manchester United. He's hogging the TV waiting for repeats. I have no problem with that, but I do have a problem with him being behind me and the fact that I cant get on playing games!

Ah, I heard Vidic! On the bench... Predictions... Oh, the repeat! Great. Just great.

Let's pray daddy gets real tired after driving all day and walks upstairs to sleep, shall we?

Dear Father...

Dont sneeze on your pet

2009-11-07T23:47:00.004+08:00

That has GOTTA be the most random headline ever. It was on yahoo. An article about how your cats can get Swine Flu, too. What the fish?

And then they talked about Big Foot. No, sadly, this has nothing to do with the pig bandits. These people formed an organization and called themselves "the Sasquatch Watch members". Yes. Mean, indeed. Why would they call such an awesome creature a sasquatch? On the article, they talked about some Big Foot sightings.

How awesome!

I wanna go hunt Big Foot, too! I promise I wont shoot him dead and make a video about my discovery; "Big Foot hanged himself cos he lacked attention and suffered from depression." (yet another random headline)

And then there was an article about T-Rex's ancestors. Scientists discovered a new dinosaur. I told you they're not extinct, they were just hiding!

Anyhoo!

Thanks to swine flu attacking cats, Big Foot's awesomeness and T-Rex's ancestors, I now forgot what I wanted to post originally.

Goodnight.

"I just want to be normal, for once in my life !"

A day (or two) in my shoes

2009-11-07T13:46:00.003+08:00

On Tuesday, Sara took my RM5 note and I didnt wanna keep my eyes off her. She tried to distract me.

Sara: *points behind me* Taylor Lautner!
Me: This is Malaysia. He's all the way in America.
Sara: Taylor and Taylor! (Lautner and Swift)
Me: *grits teeth* I wanna shoot that girl.
Sara: Do it.

I kept my eyes on Sara and formed a gun with my right hand. Pointed it behind me and BAM BAM BAM!

Me: Did I get her?
Sara: Nope, you got the wrong Taylor.
Me: Oh no, Taycob! Oh well... He's a werewolf. He heals. Let me try again. BOOM BOOM BOOM! Now?
Sara: You shot Theresa.
Me: She's a soldier of Christ. She heals too! :D
Sara: Gimme a piece of that cake and you get your RM5 ! *points at my tupperware*
Me: TATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATA! *using a machine gun this time* Did I get her?
Sara: You got everything but her.
Me: Argh! Tell me where to point!
Sara: Turn your gun 180 degrees.
Me: ... but that's gonna hit me!

And the moral of this story; Dont let Sara teach you anything. And dont lend me a gun.

Yesterday we arrived at Spring and stopped at the entrance. Sara placed her bag near the fake coconut tree and fixed something. I stared at the grass.

Me: Oh. Fake grass. Cant smoke that.
Ray: Haiyo. Fake kepala tree. Cant climb that.

This obsession stepped up a notch

2009-11-05T22:00:00.002+08:00

It was really cold that night and so I bathe in warm water. In the middle of the bath, I thought of what Theresa said the other day when I told her I was gonna take a shower.

"You wanna feel the warmth of water since you cant have Jacob or Paul eh?" Only thing is, I wasnt showering in warm water that day.

But this time I was. And I burst out in song. Ended up making a very random song about Jake and Paul.

I call this, "Dont Start"

Lyrics:
Didn't test the water, I just
Just jumped right in
Thought to myself
This could have been
Just how Jake and Paul woulda feel like

do do da do...

These werewolves,
They've got the perfect grin
such a short temper
Oh, hey, Paul
Dont hurt Jake

You dont want me to start
Phasing
Into wolves like you two
Cos I dont wanna rip outta my clothes
Cos I wont look nearly as hot as you boys do

A First

2009-11-02T15:08:00.009+08:00

I was having trouble with my faith. I sinned. And my guilt hit me hard. I know everyone is a sinner, and everyone does it, but how many truly realizes God's pain? I had a tough week, brutally killing myself over my guilt. I thought of all the sins I've committed, I thought of all those times I hurt God. He must have suffered so much.

"They may be small. But pile them all up and they make a mountain."

I poured my heart out to Theresa. All my questions and worries. I knew she would understand and I knew she wouldnt judge me. I trusted her views when it comes to Christianity. And I always will. The fact that she's an Evangelist and I'm a Catholic never matters to me. After all, we are all equal in God's eyes.

She invited me to come to Youth with her. It was on a Saturday night. Knowing my house rules, I wasnt allowed to go out at night. We both prayed that my mom would let this slip. Our prayers were answered.

Really, this was the first time I had ever been to a youth gathering. The first time I had ever gone for a Bible study. I was nervous. I didnt know what to expect. Theresa told me not to worry and to just be myself.

The first person I met was Nathanael. He was very friendly.
And then I met Phoebe, she was friendly too.
And Sarah, Disney, Alicia, Daniel.
Everyone was open.
My nerves went away.
But I was still quiet and shy.

Before youth started, I went out for dinner with Theresa and three of the new people I just met. Sarah, the leader, whose driving reminds me of my sister's, which is exciting. Phoebe, whose red hair I adore and made me wonder if she was still schooling. And Daniel, the boy with the dorky smile, who loves chillies.

Phoebe wondered if the waiter was Korean cause he looked like one. I wondered if he could dance. And then we all came to the conclusion that all Koreans can dance. Haha!

When we were back, everyone gathered in a room to pray and sing praise together. I didnt know any of the songs, so I stood and watch. Reening lead praise and worship. He had so much spirit. Everyone did. Most of them closed their eyes and tilted their heads up to heaven and sang their hearts out to God. At that moment, I wished I knew the songs so I could do the same.

When Theresa officially introduced me to everyone, they turned to me.
Everyone: Hi Phoebe!
Sarah: She is one of the THREE Phoebes here.
Someone: Really?
Sarah: One is Phoebe, Ben's cousin. Then, Phoebe this red hair one. And Phoebe...?
Theresa: Simon.
Sarah: Phoebe Simon!
Everyone: Aaahh...

These people inspired me. They have so much faith and knowledge in God. Watching and listening to them pray, sing and talk about God made me smile. They keep God's words in their hearts and they're not afraid to show it. They are happy and content. Joyful. That's the right word. One of the gifts of the spirit. One I long to have, too :)

"Remember to welcome strangers into your homes. There were some who did that and welcomed angels without knowing it."
- Hebrews 13:2

Dress Up and Mess Up

2009-11-02T02:23:00.009+08:00

I was bored out of my skull but I just wont leave the computer. So I looked up for online games. The easy, lame ones. I started playing 5 games at a time and searched for more.

I found this Twilight Couple dress up. You can do whatever the hell you want with Bella and Edward. Awesome. This is my chance! :D

This is how they initially look like.
Hey, Rob looks better in 2D!

I had to do it. Muahaha!

Now, I gave Rob a tan and teased Kristen's hair.
This has gotta be their best look so far!

Dare to be stupid and try the game.
Twilight Vampire Couple

Have fun, people. I know I certainly did...
<3>

Bambi

2009-11-02T00:07:00.002+08:00

My all time fave skate brand :)

Never wanna leave a single scratch...

Had to take the wheels, bolts and risers out.

In need of a new set of trucks -_-"

Deck Hunting

2009-11-01T22:37:00.004+08:00

10:38 P.M.
My deck went missing.
"Mummy where is it ?"
It's supposed to be right next to the fish tank. With the bolts and the riser and everything.

10: 40 P.M.
Went to the laundry place and it wasnt there.
Took the broom and gave it to mom.

10:43 P.M.

Haha! I shall have this all to myself. Kavan went off to sleep at cousin's place.

10:50 P.M.
A-hah! Found my deck! It's in the store. Whaaat the?
Time to take more pictures! :D

Alongside the sun

2009-11-01T01:21:00.004+08:00

It was 6.22 p.m. on 10th October and I was washing the dishes. Looked out the kitchen window and saw the ray of light. I just had to stop and take a picture!

I had the most fun snapping pictures of mom's daisies. They're so pretty!

This reminds me so much of a picture of Drew from NeverShoutNever.

Char Kueh Tiaw Remedy

2009-10-30T15:27:00.004+08:00

First and foremost, I'd like to take this moment to thank our Father in heaven and my biological daddy, for not taking the modem along with him while he goes traveling around Miri. I would've dropped on the floor and shape-shift if I couldnt go online for two whole weeks and Teng tells me that my farm animals have died. Good thing there's no such thing as 'death' in the game.

Teachers stopped teaching since Monday. So we were constantly apek-ing around in class. Dont get me started.

We were in the Biology lab today and Pucheng (Michelle) was giving Ah Faas (Sara) the Apek Liscence Test. Ray was writing something, I thought she had to retake the test, since she failed yesterday. Haha! Teng was reading Sara's book, the one she stole from her, as always... Sheryl was reading a pretty morbid book, it made her stomach twist but she kept on reading anyway. I rested my head on the table and I felt like puking.

Note: This happens whenever I'm hungry.

I was craving for Kueh Tiaw goreng. That was very apek of me... And then I thought to myself, "You know what would taste nicer? What? Char Kueh Tiaw! OHHH!!!"

The last time I had an awesome char kueh tiaw was when Teng brought some to school. So I asked her where the shop was.

She drew me a map.

I couldnt wait for my mom to pick me up from school and tell her, "Mummy! I want char kueh tiaw!"

Oh, the joy! We found the place. But sadly, the guy told us, "Char kueh finish already"

So we ended up eating kueh tiaw goreng. My original choice. Aiya, never got to feed the char kueh tiaw monster in me... ("-.-)

Going Wolf

2009-10-25T19:45:00.011+08:00

Aouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu !

So I went wolf hunting. Here's the cast for the New Moon wolf pack.
Brace yourselves!

(from the left) Paul, Sam Uley, Jared and Embry.

Nope, Quil is not in this poster. Or any other wolf pack poster for all that matters. Probably cos he doesnt have the body, but it's okay, Quil. You can stay on the side and cheer.

Leader of the pack and the so called Alpha; Sam Uley
Played by Chaske Spencer

The mean and bad-tempered Paul
Played by Alex Meraz

Hot, aye. Like wtf right? I used to hate Paul for being mean to Jake but heck, I change my mind.

The other big guy; Jared.
Played by Bronson Pelletier

Jake's bestfriend and the new comer; Embry
Played by Kiowa Gordon

Another one of Jake's man; Quil
Played by Tyson Houseman

G-g-g-g-gotta watch this ! (unless if you dont like spoilers)

Sweating Bullets

2009-10-25T19:24:00.005+08:00

My heart stopped pounding...

Air wouldnt get into my lungs...
Oxygen wont mix with haemoglobins...

What the nerd?

when...

I opened up yahoo and this was on the screen

*gasp for air like a loony*

And then...

When I clicked on "Scene from New Moon"

This was on...

Shit, Jake, you are wayyyy too hot for this.

Must.

Lick.

Screen.

Oh, dont glare at me like that. You're driving me insane !

Like I wasnt already...

skaters, not hooligans

2009-10-21T02:51:00.004+08:00

Almost everyone think of skaters as major punks who don't give a shit about anything except tearing up places. You see someone on a skateboard or just walk with a skateboard, you think, "Oh, he's up to no good. Get security. Get security quick!"

Come on, get it straight. Skaters skate cos they love it. Why would you bust a skater and not a cyclist? They're both practically doing the same thing. Just cruising around. Just because it's on a simple board with wheels and it wasn't created by Baron von Drais, doesnt mean it's harmful.

It's harmful to us, of course. We're the ones that fall and scrape our knees. But it as heck isnt harmful to anyone else. So why the stress?

Anyway, to all Malaysian skaters out there. There's a Cancer Awareness you can skate for. Check this out. Go to http://skateboarding-malaysia.blogspot.com/

And to everyone.

Still think skaters are hooligans?

Baby Yayo Pondan

2009-10-19T21:11:00.003+08:00

So I've been living with a sissy cat. He belongs to my sister. He initially was my dad's birthday present but Yayo doesnt like daddy one bit.

Because of my sister, and my missing fat cat, Milkyway, Yayo is officially spoiled. He's so demanding. Meow this, meow that. And his meowing is so pondan!

He sits anywhere he likes. He pees on anything he likes. Like my EST textbook! It was right in front of my eyes.

Michelle: You know, I always thought Galileo was some kind of God or something. But no, turns out he's a genius mathematician.
Me: No, he's a cat. My cat. Yayo's real name is Galileo. Yayo is his nickname.
Michelle: Why the hell did you name your cat after a mathematician?!

Yeah... dont ask me. It was my dad's idea. All our cats got their names from my genius dad.

I miss Milk so much. He was the best pillow ever.

Kelly Clarkson as a dude

2009-10-17T12:15:00.000+08:00

Amazing Parodies (I'm dead serious)

2009-10-02T23:03:00.004+08:00

So I was on youtube, converting hard-to-find songs to audio and downloading them. Came across Punk Goes Pop. Dude, these bands make the original versions sound like cow dung.

Mayday Parade sound a hell lot sexier than the PussyCat Dolls. Haha!

I'm not that big a fan of screamo bands, but hey, Alesana is awesome!

August Burns Red makes Britney Spears sound like a fag. This is just hilarious if you think about it!

A Static Lullaby's insanely dead amazing version of Toxic! It's a threat, Britney...

If your mind works the same way mine does, go check out some more Punk Goes Pop. You'll find all the awesome bands the 'world' dont have time to listen to.

The Little Aint So Little No More

2009-09-26T00:41:00.007+08:00

Remember this adorable little thing? My baby Castro.

Well, he's all grown now. Not fully-grown, I hope. He's still considered smaller than average-sized dogs.

How's he doing? Oh, I'll tell you this. He's a heck lot of work. I dont know where the hell this boy got his energy from. Like an already active squirrel OD-ed on caffeine.

About the only time he isnt hyper, is when you rub his chest.

He tears everything in his path. Dad's shoes, mom's shoes, Kavan's shirt, my slippers, my shorts. Name it, he marked it.

He's sneaky, too. Whenever we're out, he'd sneak in through the back and stay in the house like he owns the place. When we come home, the laundry just magically appear in front of the gate. We all know it was Castro's work.

What makes me a proud owner, though, is the fact that he's amused by the skateboard :D I brought my board outside one day, and was just going to put on my shoes when mom told me to sweep the veranda and water the plants. Kavan took my board and skate while I was busy. Castro chased after him.

Kavan carried Castro and placed him on the board. Had to rub his chest to calm him down. And I caught it on camera! :D The first time my little Castro got on a skateboard.

Looks like he's a goofy-footer too, aye?

After that day, he was just stoked everytime he sees me skate. He'd want in too. So does Lemon! She wouldnt stand though, she'd lie down. Hahahaha! I love my babies...

Lemon owns that chair xD

OH! I almost forgot. Castro howls like a hunger-stricken wolf. And that's not it. He teaches Lemon how to howl, too! And Lemon is just funny and adorable when she howls. They would sit across each other and howl together xD

Dysfunctional Siblings

2009-09-17T17:27:00.003+08:00

This is what my bro and I do when the camera's battery isnt flat (which doesnt happen very often). And when it did go flat, my phone came to the rescue!

This! is how we define magic !

And..then..my bro wrapped himself up with the curtain cloth.

Here's a hopping ghost for ya.

This is...err...another ghost. Flying away...

That's the end of the show!

Come back next week, okay? It wont be airing live though, just some more videos from that same day. (yes, we took a lot) I'm too lazy to find the digital camera now. Until next time! :D

Just straight up dysfunctional...

THIS is the amoi I have to live with (-_-''')

Syn-is-awesome!

2009-08-02T03:36:00.007+08:00

Synyster Gates

World's sexiest guitarist !

Why not, right?

Ho yeah...

"aww..."

He should totally smile more.

I love this guy!

Mmmhmm!

Ahah! Zacky sure is excited.

Dear sis, be prepared for

2009-08-02T01:55:00.008+08:00

M. Shadows <3

I know, it's like a dream come true xD

Someone sure loves his teeth...

I'm guessing... you got your asthma attack ?

Haha! Dont be jealous now. You know how insane Syn can get ;)

Actually, I've got a whole lot more. But hey, they'll call it 'trafficking'.

If ya know what I mean ;)

Random Acts

2009-07-25T16:10:00.002+08:00

Sheryl and I acted out a scene in Titanic. You know, the part where Jack was slipping away and Rose was trying to grab a hold of him. Sheryl was Jack. I'm Rose. Oh the drama. We tickled Michelle in the process. That weird girl has got some serious issues with her back.

I ran to the front during Moral. Hanged out with Sara, Pam and Mei Mei. Trash talked cows. I mean, lembus.

Sara: Last time during BM, the teacher asked us to fill in the blank. "Lembu itu dot dot dot di jalan raya." You know, this one guy said "Lembu itu terbabas di jalan raya."
Pam and I: *Lost 300 calories from laughing*
Mei Mei: Eh how the lembu look like if tepelanting ah? Lembu itu tepelanting di jalan raya.
Pam and I: *Lost another 300 calories*
Mei Mei: ...kerana terpijak kulit pisang.
Me: I cant breathe!
Pam: Mei Mei, so bad!
Mei: Then the susu terpancit keluar because got too much carbon dioxide.
Sara: Aiyo, you study Science for all the wrong reasons!

Mei Mei was drinking Vitagen. She was enjoying herself. I looked at the bottle...

Me: Expiry date, 12 August 2009.
Mei Mei: Ah? June la.
Sara: You butak ka? 08 is August la!
Me: Pam, she drink susu expired that's why she like this.
Pam: Susu from lembu cacat one.
Sara: Mei Mei membabaskan the lembu so she can get the susu!
Pam: Membabaskan? Where got such word!
Sara: I make myself wan la.
Me: Purple colour oh the susu.
Mei Mei: Because the lembu terbabas ma. The face blue black wan. Picit the nenen, the susu keluar purple colour la. *acts like she's milking the cow* Psssshh! Psssshhh!

Seriously, I didnt think this little girl was gonna be so random xD

how random is this

2009-07-23T17:07:00.011+08:00

If I were to have a celebrity girlfriend, it would be...

a.k.a. Erin Silver in 90210. Yes! I love her.

I know, Megan Fox is hot. But hey, I dont think I can handle her. Come on, Shia's got her in Transformers. Like, what, how many times?

Sides, the whole Bipolar thing Jess had as Silver (in 90210), was smokin. I dont know who can still look gorgeous with eyeliner dripping all over her face. I've got a thing for messed up people :)

Oh, and piercing, mysterious blue eyes! Not just any blue, Silver blue.

I love her rockin style, too.

Because she is so not your typical girly girl in cute dresses.

rest a day, work another

2009-07-02T15:21:00.003+08:00

Whoot! We got no school tomorrow. Well, for the lucky ones at least. Like me! :D And Michelle, Ray, Oreo, Pamster, Flowerface, pretty much our entire crew. Heheh we are supa awesome possum.

But here's the catch, we gotta go on Saturday. No studying though! Food and Fun Fair. Another overrated event the school throws to get money. Ridiculous; the whole argument over "who's gonna take care of the stall at this time or that?" the class had today.

We were in our own world, as always. Michelle was bangin bongos made of my Tupperware, a big recycling box and the tripod stand. My blue pens were her drumsticks. She was having a concert, pretended to be Swedish and apek at the same time. Ray and Flowerface were the groupies cheering for her. And I was her manager, doing History assignments. Was totally distracted.

There were lots and I mean, LOTS of shouting from that rockstar. Aaaand, she had her own press conference.

I've got one word,

Chaos.

I can see the future, baby!

2009-06-28T16:14:00.009+08:00

Hello, I was just lazing around, laying on the couch, watching tv. Flipping through the channels and got stuck to Discovery Travel and Living. It was about Green Homes. God, I love glass houses. Here, I'm gona post pics of how I want my house to be.

Ok, you, my future architect, I want you to design this for me! Think of the beach, blue blue ocean and being on top of a hill. Watch the waves when you open your back door in the morning. And lots of treees. Yes, let your imagination go wild!

This is just suhweet!

I'm green like that xD

First of all, I hate the view of the city. Change that to trees! Or the ocean :D

Damn, this is why I love playing The Sims.
Buy me The Sims 2, pleeeease!

Just look at the graphics!

(Click on the pics to see them in larger sizes)

Holy NUTS! I'm going crazy here! That's it. Enough, Phoebe, enough! No more Sims pictures. Please, I beg you.
Stop!

Go Skateboarding Day 09

2009-06-27T21:00:00.001+08:00

They got busted at every spot. But it's all good, baby. It's all good :)

Antisocial.

2009-06-27T17:25:00.008+08:00

Mom rated me that. "My daughter is antisocial."

I wish.

Because if I was, I wouldnt have known such a big bitch. Who I wish would just f8ck herself dead.

Was chatting with Davie today! :D

Dave: I've changed now. I'm not a horny slut no more.
Me: I never knew you once were a horny slut.
Dave: Lol
Me: I would've raped you then.
Dave: You wanna be my slut then?
Me: Is there a better word? I dont know. Slut sounds cheap.
Dave: Naww.. Fine. Expensive whore?

Planning to get the hell out of here, babe!

Dave: You know what, fuck living in your country. Move to Australia. Be my flat buddy
Me: Omg you have no idea how much I wanna do that! I really wanna study veterinary there~
Dave: Yeh, vet chick aye
Me: I wanna save animals, baby! And I dont mean just pets
Dave: I support you, baby!
Me: I mean wild animals
Dave: Kinky
Me: LOL how is that kinky?
Dave: Wild ;)

I told him how my parents are against me and the whole saving animals thing. Mom wants me to do medicine instead. Blah :P

Me: I hate it to death I'm probably gonna die trying to study that!
Dave: Lol hey medicine is keeping you alive today. And me.
Me: Yes but I dont want to be a doctor.
Dave: But my penis can handle all the diseases
Me: HAHAHA! Your penis is exceptionally strong.
Dave: Lol. I know. Like BAM! There before your eyes!
Me: You crack me up in the most ridiculous times, Davie
Dave: Heyhh that's what I'm for sweetie. I mean my sexy looks keep you horny all the time ;)

Thank you, Davie, for making me feel heaps better. Although you talk mostly about your good looks and your strong penis, which you believe turned me on. I so bloody love your ego ;)

Dave: Bloody aye you wanna be aussie? The only way you can be aussie is if you suck my BIG
Me: Can I be aussie and keep my asian look?
Dave: Lollypop :D Yeh..

My fellow Lol Gang members; Dave, Jenni and Aleen. Love you guys lots!

scratch me

2009-06-21T15:00:00.013+08:00

I was so tempted to rape this guy.

Ray and Michelle told me that the New Moon trailer was out. Thanks a lot! :P I went to check it out on youtube. Knowing badly that I would be hooked because it's all Jacob! I love Jake.

I saw him transforming into a wolf. While watching that boy run, I remembered how hot his body was the last time I saw him. Aaand...(I know..) I was beyond crazy to go look for his pics online. That's when the temptation started.

Saw posters of him. Jacob Black. Shirtless. Oh yeah, they sure know how to reel the girls in. Phoebe Simon, especially!

So, it was about 5.30am in the morning, I didnt sleep the entire night (dont ask) and I was chatting with Gurjit. Just ask him how I went drooling over Taylor's sexy bod.

"Go-ho-ho-hodddd, I love his body!"

No, that's not the only thing I love (I'm not that kinky). I love everything about him. His eyes, oh monkey, his eyes! They're just so dreamy and gahh, I am out of words. His lips.Need I say more? His jet black hair, his neck, his arms, his white teeth, his crazy smile, his girlfriend! Yes, his girlfriend. Selena Gomez. I like her. I wonder what she does to him when they're all comfortable. Okay, that sounds wrong x) About the only thing I dont like is his nose. But seriously, if his nose was perfect, I think I'd just die. All his fans would go bonkers too.

I cant wait for the movie. I'd probably be gasping for air in the theater just watching that beast. Drool. Freak out. Drool some more. Groping the arm of the person sitting next to me. Good luck, whoever you are. Ray? ;)

Vampires attacking my sexy wolf. Haha! James is dead, Ray.

I'm a sucker for guys who look like native Americans. Ahem, Taylor is one! Just explains why I, oh so badly, wanted to jump on him.

I love love love his answer! Jacob all the way, sweetie xD

I am calm.

2009-06-20T23:36:00.004+08:00

Had to wake up at 5am this morning. Got Interact Telematch, had to be in school before 6.30am. Can you believe that?

It was the first time I've been in the school in darkness. I wanted to skate that quiet and empty way.

The telematch was alright. I was stuck alone at my station just telling the groups to solve the puzzle. I missed out on the water hill slide. Ray was in charge of that station. Lucky her!

Shit happened after that. Had absolutely nothing to do with the telematch. It was just another f*ckin drama. Pissed me off. Made me sad. Hit my head on the pole repeatedly. Smash the damn water 'balloons' on the ground and pretended it was someone's head. The someone I meant in my last blog entry. I hope you choke on your dinner tonight.

Yes, I am that mad.

I slept the entire afternoon. No dreams. Woke up at 7.59 I think? Am watching X Games 08 to calm myself down.

And here is Sean Lipps. I love his voice.

swear to F it up

2009-06-20T21:53:00.006+08:00

Guess what,
I'm not scared of cursing you to hell
You mother fat hypocrite
Pose and act innocent
Try and look all pretty
Flash, flash!
I think you need to try harder
Because honey, you're so damn ugly.

Your face, your eyes, your body, your shit green soul.
I cant even look at you without feeling disgusted
I swear, I could have a pencil down my throat,
and puke all over you
Just to make you look a little better
But sadly, that wont work.
Nothing can work.
Not with you, anyway.

Are you surprised?
Good.
You f**k at judgements.
Bet you never thought
I can hate like this.

June, my love.

2009-06-18T19:30:00.005+08:00

I love this month. Why?
One, it's summer in Phobaland.
Two, Go Skateboarding Day! (21st June)

Cant wait for Sunday! WHooot!

I thought skaters in Malaysia dont do the whole unite and skate the city like Americans do every year, but hey! Check this out.

All skaters (in west Malaysia) are gonna unite at KLCC. Skate together. 5pm until late night. How suhweet is that!

Go here, http://skateboarding-malaysia.blogspot.com/2009/06/go-skateboarding-day-21-june-2009.html

Worldwide, http://goskateboardingday.org/

All pictures above are from 2008. Be sure to look out for GSD 09 videos this Sunday.

They will blow your minds out! (like they always do)

I'll be posting my favorite in here.